I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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