Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
