I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize