i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
I love having hate sex.
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Randomize
