on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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