can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
Randomize