So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
i've created a new STD.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
