The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
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