I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
Someone shattered a urinal.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I think people are normalizing furries
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
Randomize