My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize