I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
25 People Share How They Got Out Of Their Longest Dry Spell
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
21 People Confess Their Craziest Online Dating Experience
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.