If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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