That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
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