2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize