I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
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