sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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