OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
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