Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
I just gift wrapped bread.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Randomize
