I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
