I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
