I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Randomize
