her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
Randomize
