areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
Someone shattered a urinal.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
