If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
Randomize
