You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
