i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
