So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
