Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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