That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
Couch. On fire.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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