What a fucking waste of an outfit
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Randomize
