so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Randomize
