At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
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