guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
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