She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize