You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.