too bad you live with your parents still
I want you more than these girls want KFC
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
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