Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
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