Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
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