I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
