there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
