Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
