yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
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