This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Randomize
