I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
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