Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...