ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
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