just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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