i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
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