The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
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i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
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Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.