Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
